@closetoclassy: Based on the things my kid will and won't eat, my cooking is apparently worse than a stale Fruit Loop covered in dog hair.
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@Bob_Janke: Believe it or not I'm listening to the Final Countdown in the grocery store. Now you're hearing it too.
@bydanielvictor: I feel so bad for people who don’t like sports. They never experience the thrill of maybe being happy once every 10-20 years
@pizzajaynow: When a Jehovah Witness dies, Heaven turns off all the lights and pretends no one is home.