@PineapplePtart: Be careful, newbies. Twitter changes you. I used to be Puerto Rican, now I'm Irish.
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@DearAuntAbby: I need to pick up a random hunky guy in a bar, bring him home, have him invite a friend, and THEN mention that I need furniture rearranged
@EJGomez: dating tip #4: when meeting her brother for the 1st time make sure when he goes for the handshake u kiss him on the lips to assert dominance
@dshack8: "Well, I guess I'll stagger around, speak gibberish, & touch all the shit I'm not supposed to while you get irritated." Drunks & toddlers.