@Gooooats: Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Also, this is America so they all have guns.
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@extranapkins: Remember "pantsing" people in high school... sneaking up behind one of your bros and slipping an extra pair of pants on over his pants
@pourmecoffee: I hope 2016 doesn't get renewed. The plot is ridiculous and none of the characters are likable.
@ItsAndyRyan: Judge: For the crimes you have committed you will go to prison for 10 years Me: That's a long sentence! Judge: Ok - "you get 10 years"
@KeetPotato: "what's your most cherished memory keith?" [looks at my wife and baby in crowd with loving smile] [leans into mic] i heard a dog laugh once