@UrbanDouchebag: Be the change you want to find in your couch.
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@matt___nelson: Narrator: "Humans are the product of 4.54 billion years of evolution" [cut to me pressing harder on remote control when batteries are dead]
@WeissBrandon: Friend: If Nicki Minaj, Ke$ha, Nickelback, and Creed all died in a plane crash who would you miss the most? Me.. F... M.. F.. Me: the pilot
@missekay: Just saw a bumper sticker that said "supprt your local beaver" or maybe it said "support your local brewer" either way it's sound advice.