@thepatrickwalsh: "Be there in 5," I text, though I am 30 minutes away, completely nude, and engaged in a fist fight with a neighbor.
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@LoveNLunchmeat: "Sorry, but none of my clothes fit today." My date nods, and politely avoids looking at my towel and safety pins.
@itswrigley: I never did think of myself as beautiful, terribly attractive, yes, but not beautiful.
@LostFelicia: If you've never gotten stuck in a dress you tried on over your clothes in the middle of a clothing store, then you're not me.