@CatherineLMK: Be warned, person who set of a whole bunch of fireworks at 4 am--you've made a minimally powerful enemy.
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@betulesairafi: I love balloons! I keep tying them to my arm, but I think I'm getting carried away.
@MarlonBrandNO: [date] "don't let her know ur from twitter" Her: whats wrong? Me: This fork only has 3 prongs Her: So? Me: it should be called a threek
@motrboatr: Sure I'll send you a shirtless selfie. Just let me work out for 6 months real quick.
@hippieswordfish: ME: isn't this great?? WIFE: not really ME: *looks down from the top bunk* what's wrong