@KimmyMonte: before camouflage clothing was invented, people would just stand still and make tree noises.
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@daemonic3: HIM: Happy birthday, honey! I got you a gift basket, just like you wanted HER: Oh thanks! What's in it? HIM: What do you mean, "in it"?
@TheCamelToe_: I swapped my wife's tampons with party poppers. Absolutely no sense of humour that girl..
@SteveKoehler22: Top five movies that could easily have been about @ 'ers : -Alien -Psycho -Raging Bull -Close Encounters -One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest
@WilliamAder: If my wife ever hired a private detective to follow me, it would be to get pictures of me not using the coupons I said I used.