@AristotlesNZ: Before their conflict with the Decepticons, the Autobots won a much less interesting but emotionally charged war against the Emoticons.
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@senderblock23: [someone reading a beautiful poem in german] ME: i have never been more frightened
@XplodingUnicorn: Me: You should be nicer to me. You'll never have another dad. 5-year-old: Don't be so sure. Mom is pretty.
@JediGigi: My Mom taught me to treat others the way I want to be treated so I always walk up to strangers and spray canned cheese in their mouth.
@Lunatic_times: It might be a sign you have a drinking problem when the cashier at the liquor store asks if you own a bar.