@GaryJanetti: Before you tell me anything about your kid you should know I'm going to mentally leave my body.
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@NotThatMoti: Attachment isn't when 2 ppl chat night and day. When someone emails u and adds an image or data file with it, THAT FILE IS CALLED ATTACHMENT
@trentistweeting: ME: [at a party] hey! wanna come back to my place and- GIRL: hook up? sure! ME: [sadly putting away two Yu-Gi-Oh! decks] oh. awesome
@LoveNLunchmeat: If someone dies from laced cocaine, does the coroner write "devastating blow" on the death certificate?
@Shot_Of_Cabo: Two guys in CA walked off cliff playing Pokémon. Natural selection accelerated at 9.8 m/sec².