@Priscilla_YEAH: Being a parent means often saying your child is shy rather than "he sees how creepy u are, that's why he doesn't want to shake your hand".
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@chuuew: TEACHER: Have you got anything for today's palindrome class? STUDENT: dammit I'm mad TEACHER: OK, OK, I'll ask someone else
@internetluke: Waiter: Is Pepsi okay? Coke: everybody cares to ask about Pepsi. Nobody asks how I am *coke storms off angrily*
@Brianhopecomedy: I inform my 4 year old that she's going to a friend's house 5 minutes before we leave so she only asks me when we're going 6000 times.
@robfee: Dang girl are you the American health care system because if I don't give you all my money you'd have no problem watching me die.