@Priscilla_YEAH: Being a parent means often saying your child is shy rather than "he sees how creepy u are, that's why he doesn't want to shake your hand".
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@juliussharpe: Before you get married ask yourself: is this the person you want to watch stare at their phone the rest of your life?
@ryaninco: There's three cop cars in the parking lot of my gym. This might be my last Tweet for a little while.
@BatBatshitcrazy: Don't you dare look at me with that come hither stare; I haven't hithered in years.