@thatdutchperson: Being a Zombie doesn't sound that bad. You don't have a job and your entire day is spent looking for things to eat. Shit, I do that now.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@XplodingUnicorn: Me: Eat your vegetables. They make you smarter. 3-year-old: *hands me a carrot* You need this more than I do.
@originalgriz: Trump taking credit for Obama’s economy is like someone inheriting millions from his dad and bragging about what a smart businessman he is.
@daemonic3: Darth Vader: Luke Luke: ya Darth Vader: [heavy breathing] I am your father Luke: um ok Darth Vader: Also I'm vegan Luke: NNNNNOOOOOOOOO
@TheAlexP: The difference between a turtle and a tortoise is the tortoise chose to race a hare and the turtle became a Ninja.