@KevinFarzad: Being an adult is mostly pretending to like wine and saying "the economy" a lot.
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@onelongbender: When people tell me I'm intimidating, I generally just glare at them until they take it back.
@longwall26: *Paul Ryan watches a children's hospital explode* Hhhhmmm, an affordable source of heat and light
@Contwixt: "My water-bowl wasn't filled to its usual level so I stole your watch and peed in your shoes." --Cats
@AJslackie2: *Lexus dealership* Sales person: if you buy a new Lexus we will make the first months payment Me: so who makes the other 59 payments?