@DelanieFischer: Being an adult means assuming someone's dead every time your parents call you at work.
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@EJGomez: LAWYER 1: numbers never lie so I call numbers to the stand LAWYER 2: your honor I call shakiras hips to the stand JUDGE: damn lol
@dorkwing_duck: The scene where Indiana Jones swaps the bags and runs from a boulder but it's me trying to eat a cookie without my kid seeing me
@BonaFideIntent: Me: I won't be in due to a VOLCANO Boss: ..we live, in Florida..? Me: IRRELEVANT Boss: Me: *opens 3rd bottle of vodka, puts on arm floaties*