@KeithAshers: Being bitten by a radioactive spider made Peter Parker suddenly fluent in karate & gymnastics...you know, just like a real spider.
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@Wuttercuerk: "Hi I'm here to interview for the branch manager position." "We're only hiring tree trimmers." "That's exactly what I just said."
@OhNoSheTwitnt: I'm keeping a greater distance behind this truck with a vanity plate that reads "IMTEXAN" than I do behind cars with "Baby on board" signs.
@murrman5: [a loud action sequence gets suddenly quiet and all you can hear in the theatre is me talking to the guy next to me] sell me your popcorn