@ConcernedMom420: Being dark skinned is a CHOICE. In just a few years, through prayer, celebrity Beyonce is almost completely white. You can change too.
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@seanscrap: Got busted for shoplifting once in Canada and had to deal with their whole irritating Good Cop/Great Cop routine.
@Bandersnaaatch: Hell hath no fury like this woman attempting to type "scorned" and having it autocorrected to "scrotum" 13 times in a row.
@BobLoblaw143637: Lying on my bed struggling to squeeze into jeans The dog comes in to show emotional support ... followed by the cat, who came to judge.
@QwertyJones3: I joined a poker tournament with a bunch of people who do origami. I'm gonna dominate, cause these guys always fold.