@LeahTiscione: Being funny is connecting two unrelated things and making a joke, said my parents
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@Real_Dick_Head: When you wave your hand under automatic soap dispenser for 45 seconds and nothing, then it dispenses the minute you switch to the next one.
@BlairLoudly: Me: SPIDER! Brain: Nope, fluff. Me: SPIDER! Brain: That is a fly. Me: SPIDER!!! Brain: sigh. That's your hand idiot.
@TheRealDratch: Trying to get lunch w 4 yo in restaurant: "If you can't behave we're going to have to leave here." "But I want to leave here." Touché.
@Dani_Feld: I walked into a room full of men and they couldn't stop staring at me. Oh...wrong toilets.