@fillthevacuum: Being with you is like listening to golf on the radio.
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@PAT_E_ROCK: Girl: So, how many inches is it? Pat: How many inches is what? G: You know.. P: Uhhh, about 200 dollars long. G: OMG, It's so big!
@kelkulus: Felix Baumgartner's 127,000 ft jump becomes world's greatest free fall, unseating previous record set by the 2008 US Economy. #spacejump
@RobertJrDowney: If Twitter was invented by a woman, The character limit would be 10,000 characters.
@_ElvishPresley_: I like to stand in the corner at parties and blow on anyone who walks by. People hate it, but I'm a fan.