@WheelTod: Better to have loved & lost than to have never loved at all; but if going spelunking was your idea, you should at least *try* to find her.
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@SteveSuckington: [1st time on phone with a girl] I've got butterflies in my stomach It's so cute that you're nervous [eating 2nd bowl of butterflies] huh?
@Book_Krazy: A cubical is a great place to reflect on all the bad decisions you've made in your life
@themiltron: [God creating beards] ADAM: God, I don’t like my face. GOD: Tell ya what, buddy: I’ll cover it in pubes. ADAM: What? That’s not— GOD: Done.
@treydayway: I hate when people use words without knowing the meaning...gives me a huge hysterectomy on the side of my head.