@PanicRestroom: "Billie Jean" is probably my favorite song about someone named Billie Jean
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@Parker_Simpson: When I'm backing out of a parking spot I like to just close my eyes and gun it because anythings possible through Jesus Christ
@ShockTartBionic: I'm like Jason Bourne, only I'm not looking for exits in each room.. I'm looking for outlets & phone chargers.
@caseytduncan: The worst part about getting kidnapped would be when the news told everyone your real height and weight.
@IamEnidColeslaw: cats are the best because you can pet one while you're talking to someone and look totally evil