@NYC_Blonde: Billion dollar idea: Tea bags that are actually wine bags. Slogan: You already act like you're God, now turn water into wine like Jesus!
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@WineMummy: Sorry I had sex with your hot gardener, but in my defense, you did say that I needed Jesus in me.
@SortaBad: My neighbors hurt some bystanders by illegally setting off fireworks. If only there had been a good guy with fireworks around to stop them
@3sunzzz: M: There was yelling and pushing! I've never been trapped in a mob! I was so scared! H: It was a 3rd grade field trip. M: I BROKE A NAIL!
@honeybadgerMel: Never underestimate the power of a hug. Or a slap upside the head. Whatever works.