@markleggett: Bing is a fast search engine because you're the only person using it.
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@LaziestCanine: Murderer: IM GOING TO STRANGLE YOU Me: wow your hands are so soft Murderer: omg really Me: [caresses his hands] what moisturizer do you use
@lazerdoov: "Be cool, it's the cops" I said to my 3 cats I dressed up like robbers as my other 3 cats came out of the kitchen dressed like policemen
@ddsmidt: Sure you call it a college fund for your kid, yet deep in your heart you know it’s bond money.
@ndiquote: [first date] her : where do you see yourself in next 10 years? me : at our daughter’s piano recital