@trojansauce: *bites into tuba sandwich and breaks teeth* damn autocorrect
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@bourgeoisalien: A skinny friend told me she's never hungry and just 'forgets to eat', so I drove her out to the woods and left her for dead. Is that wrong?
@KalvinMacleod: I accidentally took an extra step when I reached the top of the stairs and now I'm in a marching band.
@PinkCamoTO: The "we're going to need a bigger boat" scene from Jaws but just me looking at the shopping carts at the liquor store.