@MatCro: Bloody Foreigner, coming over here, wanting to know what love is.
@TripleFlip66: Sorry I booped your nose during your meltdown ..
@DearAnyone: A good way to get out of a conversation is to take off one of your socks and hand it to the person talking.
@TheTalkingPipe: I hope when the machines take over the world they start by fixing my cable.
@StarksWeek: Accidentally ordered a large Coke from McDonalds. My Smart Car tipped over
@envydatropic: First date - I'll have an ice water and a lettuce wedge
Tenth date - I'll have a large pizza, extra cheese. What do you want, honey?