@MatCro: Bloody Foreigner, coming over here, wanting to know what love is.
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@Rhythms_n_Booze: Cop: Do you know why I pulled you over? Me: Honestly I'm so shit faced I have no idea.
@KenJennings: Landlocked countries with beach volleyball teams: who do you think you're fooling?
@Tups13: I stare at the cats. "And in space, if you knock something slowly off the table, it just gently floats away." They look at me in horror.