If bad ads/pop-ups are redirecting you, please take a screenshot and email it to [email protected]. Help us keep the site clean!
@DumbConfessions: "Blow me."
@Schmoodles: It's a shame push-up bras don't work on IQs.
@BassoonJokes: RIP that guy in the audience of the eric clapton unplugged session whose head literally exploded when he realized the song was "layla"
@junkyardigan: Whenever I utter the word 'sober' I wash my mouth out with alcohol.
@jergarl: Wife:Have you seen the bag of dog treats?
Me:*flashback of drunk me eating what I thought was a bag of beef jerky..
W: Really? Idiot.
@LaLuchaNix: My husband says none of my metaphors make any sense. He is just an empty canoe in the snow.