@donni: Blue cheese dressing makes anything a salad. For example, this french fry salad I'm eating right now
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@TheBoydP: Brain cancer from cell phones is no longer considered a risk because who holds their phone up to their head anymore?
@Wine_Honey1: Be careful how much wine you drink, might end up vacuuming the driveway in your panties
@Brianhopecomedy: I assume when I get put on hold after I call customer service it's because 2 guys are flipping a coin to see who pretends to be the manager.
@NASHterpiece: I'm glad it's the thought that counts because I spend all day thinking about the shit I should be doing.