@momma0315: Body by Oreos
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@T_Bonezzz: My girlfriend said she wants me to make her feel like shes the only girl in the world. So i'm gonna drop her off in the desert and leave
@64spoons: Got CPR and CCR confused. Ended up playing "Fortunate Son" on my boombox while watching a man die.
@LoveNLunchmeat: It's not enough to get up at 8 am & freeze on the soccer field. One must also scream from the sidelines so everyone knows you care.
@AaronFullerton: USA: "Hey nachos, today's your big day!" Nachos: "What about Cinco de Mayo?" USA: "What'd you just say?" Nachos: "Nothing."