@MommaWordsIt: Bonnie said I should join the Facebook like she did. Said its good way to get in touch with friends. Lord, at my age I'd need a ouija board
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@pleatedjeans: Always live on the bottom floor it's further from heaven and harder for God to see you sinning
@JoePetroske: 1: Acquire scuba gear. 2: Strap duck decoy to head. 3: Dive in local pond. 4: Enjoy unlimited free bread crumbs.
@marcia_bee: Turns out fantasy football is nothing like I thought it would be. Anyone interested in a naughty quarterback outfit? Serious inquiries only.
@david8hughes: [steps off crosstrainer] "Hey girl [out of breath, hands on knee] you like f-fitness? Cos I'm fitn--" "Shall I call an ambulance?" "Please."