@hurlarious: Bored? Find group photo of 4 women on Instagram. Comment "You 3 look incredible!!"
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@thentherewasmo: I'm not saying your cat doesn't care about you, I'm saying if Lassie was a cat, Timmy would still be in that well
@PeaceInTruth1: Telemarketer: Good afternoon, Sir. Me: Do you walk with a limp? Telemarketer: No. Me: Want to? Telemarketer: Thank you for your time.
@Scott_A_Gilmore: Ladies, if he says he would go to the "end of the earth" for you and then he goes missing, check Finland.