@enclaire: Bored, so I'm going to find a kid that looks like me and tell her I'm her from the future.
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@rolldiggity: A fun gym game is to drag your treadmill behind someone else's, and then run with a determined glare while holding a bat.
@Robert_Beau: My boss accused me of sticking my finger in his BD cake in the break room fridge, but he is completely wrong, it wasn't my finger.
@fillthevacuum: *checks pockets for phone 53 times before jumping in pool* *skinny dips to be on the safe side*
@super_morgasm: Facebook is great! It reminds me to go to the gym and take my birth control so I don't end up like everyone I went to high school with.