@WoodyLuvsCoffee: Boss asked if I was ready for more responsibility. I'm eating around a sticker on an apple cause I'm too lazy to peel it off so I guess no.
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@Kim_pulsive: I had sex twice in 24hours and I'm so glad that I have 4000 people to brag about it to
@NurseSeymour: Hooking up with your ex is a great way to reassure yourself that dying alone wouldn't be the worst thing in the world.
@lazerdoov: I'm not saying I did terrible things last night but satan just woke up on my couch and he won't make eye contact with me.
@DrainBamagedHD: Hey, people who leave the volume on an odd, non divisible by 5 number, how do you live with yourselves?!