@Bollingmargaret: Bottom line: parenting interferes with my ability to be lazy.
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@NoTheOtherJohn: [Lies on resume about having gone to preschool] Boss: You're hired. Your first task is to make me a macaroni picture. Me: *eyes widen* what
@ericsshadow: If she calls me lazy again, I swear I'll get off this couch and go take a nap in bed.
@Lexi__Alexandra: A recent study shows 50% of people think that people who can't spell are idiots .. The other 50% said "that's ridiclious!"
@juliussharpe: My wife wants to have another kid. That's like seeing light at the end of a tunnel and saying, "I think we better turn around."