@wolfpupy: bought a box of 100 crickets from the pet store and released them back into the ocean were they belong
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@sass_n_ass: No thanks, Winter Olympics. If I wanted to see a bunch of white people playing in the snow, I'd hop on over to Facebook.
@doktorj: "The only thing we have to fear is fear itself, and being tagged in a super unflattering photo."
@FatherWithTwins: 4yo: Raise your hand if you are young Me: *raises hand 4yo: No, daddy, not you.
@Mom_Overboard: Me: Dare me to find out how many Reese's peanut butter cups can fit in my mouth?! Date: What's happening right n- Me: CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!