@Brianhopecomedy: Bought an ice cream cake and the cashier told me to keep it in the freezer until serving as it will melt. I gotta start dressing smarter.
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@kelkulus: Kim Jong Un has upgraded himself from "Leader of North Korea" to "Supreme Leader of North Korea" by adding sour cream and extra cheese.
@Contwixt: Went to get coffee for a coworker. I effed up the order, but used it as a teaching opportunity to illustrate the dangers of outsourcing.
@KalvinMacleod: As the pair of scissors steps up to the starting line, the other runners quickly realize that this race just got a whole lot more dangerous.