@atstephenbell: bowie leaves us and then a 9th planet appears, i don't need to read your science article
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@KeetPotato: [dog paws your leg when you stop stroking his head] 1st time: "aww cuuuute" 2nd time: "ha okay" 3rd time: "i am trapped in a nightmare"
@MarfSalvador: Him: *Head in hands* Her: What's happened? Him: Well- I...I... I found this head
@Donna_McCoy: If you add enough jalapeños no one will ever know you're a bad cook.
@InThaBurbs: Nothing wakes you up faster than a 5 y/o kicking open your door like SWAT and jumping on you in bed.
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