@zoebread: brace yourselves, the orthodontist just died
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@TeeJayRush: Just got a Life Alert bracelet. Now, if I get a life, I'll immediately be alerted...
@gruffybeard: Her: I need a living will. Me: *wiping blood off knife* I've got a dead Steve. Close enough?
@Reverend_Scott: [class trip] I'm farmer Joe, this is my farm DO U HAVE COWS? Yes, it's a dairy farm DO U HAVE WHALES? Kid, why wouldn't we have whales?
@JH_Moncrieff: "I don't understand...we're a grocery store. Do we really need an editor on staff?" Yes. Yes, you do.