@OneLastStranger: Brains are awesome... I wish everyone had one.
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@davetureq: They found the charred body rolled into an old carpet, locked inside the trunk of a burned out car. The police suspect foul play.
@jaelteon: interviewer: do you have any experience in a leadership role? me: well, I am the group admin for a WhatsApp group
@SenatorBigfoot: *dies & becomes a ghost* Wow! The philosophical & theological repercussions of this are staggering! I've got to tell-- *is eaten by Pac-Man*
@TheAlexNevil: Me: Are you scared? 7: A little. M: Me too. It's ok. I'm right here. 7: M: Wife: Oh my god--it's just broccoli!