@trouteyes: BREAKING: A man who took British Airways to court after his luggage went missing has lost his case.
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@LurkAtHomeMom: No thanks, I'm not hungry right now. I'll just wait until after you put it away and sit down. Then I'll have some. -kids
@997omar: Whenever I meet a new baby, I stand still and let it come up to me and smell my hand first before I try to pet it
@ComedicBust: ME: I’ll try and fix it. What’s your password? GRANDMA: Rough&Raw69 ME: Well then, I can probably guess what’s wrong with your computer...
@MariyaAlexander: My favorite thing to do at a rock and roll concert is to yell “kiss, kiss, kiss” every time the guitarists stand close together and face each other to riff