@Home_Halfway: BREAKING: Pluto is once again a regular planet.
"It was always huge & full sized!" said one dwarf planet scientist with a fake mustache.
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@briangaar: You had me at "we've got the place surrounded"
@cepheusjackson: [GRAND CANYON] WIFE: Isn't this incredible? ME: It's ok. WIFE: Were you expecting a thousand canyons? ME: I don't want to talk about it
@kumailn: "Every family on 2013 had 'quite the year'." - study conducted using Christmas newsletters
@novicefather: I remember back when I had to charge my Nokia 8210 once every 96 days. My iPhone lost 4% just typing this tweet.
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