@novicefather: Bro. It's not ladies man, it's ladies' man. Chicks dig a dude who can navigate a plural possessive.
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@kashmir_lover1: According to my gym trainer, I need to cut back on drinking According to my bartender, I look great Moral of the story: I'm drunk
@yoyoha: I bet Hannibal Lecter was pretty disappointed when he found out a five finger discount had nothing to do with purchasing fingers.
@Mr_Kapowski: I'm gonna buy some cheese and put it behind glass with a sign that reads "In queso emergency, break glass"