@fart: btw, my linkedin endorsements for "Dreamweaver" are for me singing the song Dreamweaver and not for using that software
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@mjkspeaks: God, grant me the serenity to accept this stolen property, the courage to sell it on eBay, and the wisdom to not get caught.
@SmartassChef: Most of my one night stands happened because they knew they would get a fabulous breakfast the next morning.
@EndhooS: Wife: He's just so literal all of the time, he gets so confused Psychiatrist: Is this true? Me: [worried] Are u really gonna make me shrink?