@IamJackBoot: Bugs Bunny taught me my choices aren’t limited to fight or flight, I can also pretend I’m a pretty lady.
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@Gooooats: My toddler just asked, "Where's mom?" and I told him to go ask his mom. He accepted this response and went off to ask her.
@UncleDuke1969: Me: Better late than never! Wife: ... M: Seeing red? W: ... M: Go with the flow! W: ... M: I'll go buy tampons. W: NOW, MISTER FUNNY MAN.