@michaelianblack: Bummed that there's no obvious place to insert a $ into my name.
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@Adar79Angie: *friend gets divorced Mon* *friend goes on date Tues* *I break up with boyfriend* *15 years later I casually smile back at a stranger*
@only_one_ee: Trainer: OK this week we are cutting carbs. Me: Wait, what - even macaroni & cheese? Trainer: Ya. Me: ...I think we should see other people.
@RaynaTheGreat: All of your inspirational tweets make me want to track you down and pee on something you love.
@Emperor_Laykes: One advantage of being a woman is no one can surprise you with a kid years later and tell you you're the mom.