@michaelianblack: Bummed that there's no obvious place to insert a $ into my name.
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@MomOnFire: Them: You're burnt out. Me: Yes. T: You need a break M: Yes. T: I'm worried. M: Okay. Will you watch my kids for a minute? T: Hell no.
@SuperJuanderer: The other giraffes watched and giggled as Herbert got to button number 87 on his dress shirt before they told him he started one button off.
@TheHyyyype: NEW TEACHER: i'm mr. jones. before we get started, i want to make a few things clear, "baes" and "fams." i'm not your "squad" and this isn't "goals." this is english class, where we speak correctly. "sorry not sorry." STUDENT: mr jones TEACHER: yes? STUDENT: that was lit