@ingmarbirdman: *bumps into cute girl while typing on calculator* oops! got a bit carried away inventorying my lizards *makes sure she sees the 99999999999*
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@senderblock23: If you love something, let it go. Unless that thing is a cat. Your cat will not come back.
@lisaxy424: Me: time for bed Brain: yeah I'm tired too M: really? wow we may actually get some slee- B: hey do you think anyone's died in this house?
@WonderMonkey78: Atheists don't believe in God or the "i before e except after c" rule of spelling.
@PerfectPending: Husband: I'm going to take kids to do something fun today so you can relax. Me: sounds awesome! H: Will you get them ready for me?