@DaHess1: @BurgerKing I love the way all employees working the drive thru speak English as a 14th language. I just got a frog and an avocado.
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@markleggett: People who push and shove to get on a flight before other passengers are possibly going to get to their end destination one second faster.
@panmidwest: [First Date] HER: Do you consider yourself a feminist? ME: Oh I'm not feminist at all! HER: ME: In fact, some of my best friends are women.
@CoolBabyRat: *mugger walks up* GIMME EVERYTHING YOU GOT! *mugger slowly walks away with $2.16 and a lifetime of anxiety & existential misunderstanding*