@isabelzawtun: Bursting from my chair, I pound a fist on the boardroom table. Everyone's gasps turn to cheers as I lift my hand to reveal the dead mosquito
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@jessokfine: [Sexting] "So, what are you wearing?" A nice blouse and a light sweater. Sensible shoes.
@4ndBest: [Crime scene] Detective: the victim was high af when he died.. you could say it was *takes off sunglasses* D: blunt force trauma
@PaperWash: Super Mario is so unrealistic. No brother would ever help find his missing sister in law.
@JermHimselfish: I got everyone a pet snake for Christmas but you have to catch it, they're in my house, they're everywhere, please come get your snake.