@caseytduncan: But I'm the good kind of abomination, right???
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@AnkCoupleTO: Her: Baby, do that thing that makes me hot Me: *kisses her neck* H: *slaps me* I MEANT turn the thermostat up dummy, it's freezing in here
@NYC_Blonde: I told the barista my name was "Britney Spears" just for giggles and he handed me my coffee with "annoying white girl" written on it instead
@Henry_3k: Next time at a public swimming pool just stop, look around & ask yourself: "Is there anyone here that I would want to take a bath with?"