@RobDenBleyker: Butt weight. There's more!
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@rachelle_mandik: am i supposed to have a separate mouth with which to kiss my mother please advise
@ImaFlyontheWall: *follows around a family of ducks in the park while playing Sandstorm on a boombox*
@ZiddiAkki: Me washing my car Neighbour: Hey what’s up? Washing your car? Me: No, I’m watering it to see if it’ll grow into a bus.
@doktorj: If anyone needs me, I'll be spending the rest of my life under this bathroom light that gives my abs a hint of definition.