@Rollinintheseat: Buy a ticket to Finding Dory and yell "She's right there!" every time she comes on the screen until you're escorted out of the theater.
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@TheBoydP: Wife: Where'd you buy my gift? Me: Bed Bath & Beyond Wife: You used a coupon right? Me: Coupon? *wife faints*
@JasonLastname: Sees friend from highschool. Gives friend a big hug. Refuses to let go of friend. Becomes siamese friends.
@n0tblonde: You can tell a lot about a woman from her hands, for instance if they are firmly around your throat she is probably slightly upset.