@myonlymizztake: *Buys Samsung smart fridge. Opens app every 15 minutes to see if there's anything good in there*
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@heidi420x: if i could choose one super power right now it would be the ability to delete my number from other people's phones.
@Love_bug1016: I can't do this. I think I'm dying. Why does your face look like a donut? ~ me 30 minutes into dieting
@thatUPSdude: Her; My phones dead let me use yours Me; (throws phone out car window) oh I must of left it at home
@BlairLoudly: I've easily spent 12% of my life chuckling at my own jokes and being grossed out by my own body. Also, I like random percentages.