@mikefossey: BuzzFeed writer (innocently): hey friends. as a friendly activity, tell me your funny anecdotes. coincidentally I have an article due soon
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@ch000ch: one time a kid at recess said i couldnt actually dig a hole to china, i said "Watch me" then walked away. i avoided him the rest of the year
@T_N_Crumpets: [Restaurant] Me: I know in your profile it said you were small but I didn[my date falls into her soup]
@topaz_kell: I'm in a constant battle between wanting a hot body and wanting a hot fudge sundae.